Monday, June 9, 2008

Love So Desires

You know why I heart SATC?
Well, of course there are many reasons...but the recurring theme that's never trendy or unfashionable is because it's simply about single gals...looking for love.

"I'm looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love.”
-Carrie Bradshaw

To cheese this post up a little more, there's a movie quote from Dream for an Insomniac used frequently (not recommending the movie):

"Unless it's mad, passionate, extraordinary love, It's a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life. Love shouldn't be one of them."

And I have no shame telling you that too is what I want.

I've loved many, but I've only been in love once.
And it was amazing.
I would recommend it to anyone.
My problem is that it was just with the wrong guy...

My mom's prayed for it since I was born...
As a little girl, I dreamt of it with pink castles. My Little Pony unicorns, and Strawberry Shortcake...
And as a teenager/early-20s I had sleepless nights not understanding why M/J/B/G/H or whoever he was, wasn't the prince-charming-here-to-save-me-from-the-fire-breathing-dragon-of-a-reality-I'm-living...

As a Christian, I had to come to grips with the possibility that God may not have it in His plans for me to ever find love and marry *gulp*
On that same token- as a child of God, I am acutely aware that this longing desire for me to have a helpmate is innate and very real.

"All night long on my bed I searched for the one my heart loves. I looked for him but didn't find him. I will get up. I'll go around in the city. I'll look through all of its streets. I'll search for the one my heart loves. So I looked for him but didn't find him."
Song of Songs 3:1-2

I'm not just looking to be married. Don't we all know people who have the marriage goal in mind from the beginning, only to settle for someone "okay" or "amicable"? I want something incredible, I want a blessing beyond what I could ever creatively construct.

I want LOVE.

That flutter-in-your-chest, can't-help-but-beam, gushing-sunshine-and-grins, twinkle-in-your-eyes, lightheaded-elation, giddy-anticipating, indelible LOVE.
And I want it with the right guy this time.

"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires"
Song of Songs 2:7b / 3:5b / 8:4b

So God...
Love so desires.

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